Dearest Readers,
I would like to clarify a few things in light of issues that have been brought up to me. First I would like to discuss the purpose of this blog. There are a few reasons for me writing this. One reason is that it is very therapeutic for me. Being able to put my thoughts down on paper really helps me sort them out and deal with emotions. Another reason is that I hope I can help those struggling with church doctrine, or gay feelings. I want them to know that there are legitimate options available to them. A third reason is that I want Mormons to understand why I left. Some of you may see this as a desperate attempt to justify my beliefs, but in reality, I just want to be understood. I want Mormons to know that there are other opinions out there that have as much validity as theirs. As a result, sometimes I may come off a little harsh towards the Mormon church. This is a common symptom of ex-mormons; we feel betrayed and feel like lashing out. I do my very best to be fair to the Mormon church. I provide church approved sources, and try to quote directly.

That being said, I am far from perfect. I want my blog to be interesting and entertaining, so sometimes I am satirical. It is also difficult to include the whole discussion of an issue. When I try to do that I find myself writing ten pages or more. I'm a busy person so I don't have time to discuss each view point thoroughly. People would also get bored really quickly and I don't want that. As I've said, if you have a problem with what I've written, or an objection, I will do my best to respond. I try to be understanding, and acknowledge everyone's viewpoints, and if I'm not doing that I would like to be aware of it. I do not want people to feel as if I am attacking their beliefs. Rather, I would hope you see it as a critique.

Another problem is that a majority of my knowledge about the Mormon beliefs comes from my time spent there. As a result, it is biased, and I acknowledge that. But I also think that  personal account is much more valuable than arguing theology and theory, and is infinitely more interesting.

I would now like to address something that I wrote about in my last post, that I realize I didn't explain thoroughly enough. When I cited President Packers talk, I mentioned that he said it was okay to use violence against gay people. Some people noted that he was only advocating violence against those trying to force themselves on you. In this, I would condone violence, if need be. However, President Packer doesn't give very much information about the story, so some say you can't draw conclusions about his intent.
The issue that I have is not with the actual story. Violence has been committed against gay people for a long time, and while not excusable, is not a reason to condemn the entire Mormon church. What I have a problem with is the way he presented it, which subtly conveyed that it is okay to hurt gay people. His obliqueness and vagueness about the situation is the problem. I will lay this out in equation form to help you understand.
In a normal situation this is what we would have:

          Person makes inappropriate, aggressive  sexual advances = Okay to attack

Packer however, presented the situation like this:

          Person who is gay makes sexual advances = Okay to attack

Perhaps the missionary was aggressive, or perhaps he just made a sexual comment. Packer fails to mention anything about how the straight missionary was approached, and by omitting these details, the audience equates an approval of violence with the fact that he was gay, not with forceful sexual advances. Whether or not Packer intended to approve violence against homosexuals, the rhetoric he used contributes to an overall atmosphere of anti-gayness. It is this sort of thinking that encouraged and continues to encourage stereotyping and discrimination.

As I said in my last post, the Mormons are generally very loving and accepting. Currently, the church has the most progressive stance on the issue that they could have, without actually changing church doctrine. In my post, I was not trying to say that the Mormon church advocates for a Gay Witch Hunt, but I was trying to explain why the church's attitude towards homosexuality contributed to me leaving. I used Packers talk to emphasize the hurtful undertones that often pervade in the church, even with an appearance of acceptance and love.

I hope this clears up any confusion, and makes more clear my point.

Just so you know, next week I will have more to say about Mormons and the gays, but it will be in a legal, equal marriage, context.

Thanks for reading,
 Joshua Read